Love Musings: The Story

15 Jan

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“Girrrrrrrl, I was through with him. He kept blowin’ up my phone, but I never called him back. He got the hint after a while.”

“He was in the pew behind me. He tapped my shoulder and asked me where I got my Bible. We’ve been inseparable ever since.”

“I made him wait like three months before he got some. I was not trying to rush.”

*sigh* The story. We all have at least one. We have a story about how some guy was semi-stalking us, how we met our current beau and how we were prudent with the punany.  Most of the time, such stories have a sprig of truth, but rarely are they 100 percent faithful accounts of what actually happened.

There’s nothing wrong with propagating casual myths per se, unless you start to believe your own hype. You want to save face with your girlfriends and act like you weren’t staring at your cellphone, willing it to ring? Fine. Just remember that in reality, you did care about whether or not he called and maybe you were even a little bit desperate. Acknowledge your behavior and change it if you think it needs to be changed.

I have some stories.

Sometimes there were too many ugly details and it was just easier to put together some nice neat “facts” into a package and wrap that package with a pretty pink bow.  That would apply to the time I was dumped by a guy I had lived with for a few months. I didn’t hide the fact that it was his decision to split up, but there were soooooo many gory details to how it all went down, I just couldn’t begin to tell the whole dang story to everyone who had questions.

Other times, I was purely trying to maintain my superwoman, totally-in-control facade. That would apply to the couple times I might have made it seem like I stopped calling a guy when really he stopped calling me. Eh. You live and you learn.  I thought I was a great catch (still do), but not every guy I dated agreed. Now, I understand that I am a delightful person, but not necessarily the right woman for every guy that catches my interest. That fact does not diminish my worth or desirability. I understand that now.  I thought I had  to be the girl to every guy that happened into my life. Not so.

In short, create a story if  that’s what you need in your life at the time, but don’t fool yourself while you’re (trying to) fool other folks.

How many stories do you have going right now?


Posted by on January 15, 2010 in Love


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4 responses to “Love Musings: The Story

  1. Ms. Dee

    January 15, 2010 at 10:39 am

    I can so relate to this because in the past I have had my share of stories about how things may or may not have gone down in a relationship. Most of my stories just kept me from feeling the hurt or having to face the reality of a situation. Fortunately I’ve grown and come a LONG way since those days and now when I tell my story it’s TRUE, crazy, but true lol

  2. loveisdope

    January 19, 2010 at 10:08 am

    Crazy (but true) stories are the best kind! 😉

  3. The Jaded NYer

    January 20, 2010 at 4:08 am

    I have enough stories going on right now to last three lifetimes.


  4. tracey k in ohio

    January 26, 2010 at 10:50 am

    Hey! Haven’t commented in a while, but I’ve definitely been here 🙂 Good post; I’m gonna steal part of Ms. Dee’s comment: “…Most of my stories just kept me from feeling the hurt or having to face the reality of a situation…” She summed up everything I was thinking with that one line. Thanks!


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